A brief review of my 2019

2019 was a strange year for me.

Looking at it superficially, nothing went wrong. I carried on with my life, managed to stay afloat, my translation work went somewhat satisfactorily, I was able to expand my technology horizons by getting to know other platforms better through the acquisition of new older devices; even the summer holidays went better than usual.

My interest in photography was rekindled: while I still love shooting film, the mostly unexpected and serendipitous acquisition of a few interesting digital cameras (Olympus E‑420, Pentax Q, Fujifilm X‑E1, Fujifilm FinePix F30) gave way to further experimentation — and that was a lot of fun.

From a personal workflow standpoint, in 2019 I was able to fully take advantage of my post-MacBook Pro setup — iMac as main workstation at home, 11-inch MacBook Air as mobile solution — and things have worked fantastically well. To the point that that iPad upgrade I was considering back in 2018 turned out to be unnecessary and has been delayed indefinitely. This happened thanks to the extreme versatility of the 11-inch MacBook Air, a machine I would never consider buying when new, which has now become, just a year after purchase, the second best Mac I’ve ever had (nothing beats my 12-inch PowerBook G4, of course).

But 2019 has also been a year of disappointment. I’m still very much interested in technology in general: the big picture, where tech is going, what’s being produced, and so forth. I haven’t really lost my enthusiasm and the ability to get excited over some new products or solutions. And I still am very deeply interested in subjects like design and usability in connection with technology.

But a lot of the people in technology, how technology is talked about, the debates over whatever it is the latest silly topic du jour, etc., have been wearing me down considerably. Engaging in tech-centric discussions, whether online or offline, has increasingly felt like an exercise in futility, no matter how articulately you present your point of view. This, in turn, has led me to write less on this blog. And while I’ve always maintained that I shall write an article only when I feel I really have something to say — as opposed to just keep this space updated with filler link pieces and one-line commentary when I’m not inspired to write long-form — I am disappointed that I haven’t been able to write more. At the time of writing, the entire body of articles I’ve written in 2019 consists of the ‘Latest 30 Posts’ you can see in my Archives page. It’s a bit disheartening.

Even worse, 2019 has been a terrible year with regard to my creative writing and fiction. Not that 2018 was better, but there were different reasons for its terribleness. Here, it truly feels like a ‘lost’ year. All my projects have progressed little, if at all. This time, it really wasn’t writer’s block, nor laziness on my part; and yet I lacked focus and organisation. I simply let work and other stuff take most of my mental energies, so that little was left for writing fiction at the end of the day. Which is rather stupid, in retrospect, given that writing is what I do best.

I try to maintain a ‘glass is half full’ kind of attitude and, when looking back at 2019, I tell myself that, sure, it wasn’t a great year for my output, but was a good ‘input’ year — meaning I spent it mostly learning new things, ‘consuming’ more ‘content’, researching stuff and feeding my inspiration. But I can’t help feeling dissatisfied. I can’t help feeling that last year was a big waste of time, right when I’ve reached that middle-age phase when time is perceived as an increasingly precious resource.

My only resolution at this point is to write more; or rather, to revisit my priorities in order to put my writing back where it belongs — sharing first place with my daily job. I’ve been keeping creative notes here and there, but I really need to finish my first novel of the Low Fidelity series; I need to act on these notes I’ve kept nursing and write the short stories that should become the third book in my Minigrooves series.

2019 wasn’t a great year for me, but I am thankful for all the people in my social network who have been supportive, who have lent an ear when I needed venting on Twitter, who have helped me in a way or another. That’s always appreciated and never taken for granted. Here’s to a better 2020!